When writing your memoirs, be sure to keep in mind your two primary goals:
1. And by far the most important--to sell books. (duh)
2. Exculpate yourself. (also, duh)
[check & check]
Memoirs are supposed to be self-serving, so make sure yours serves you. The bigger the firestorm and more outrageous the allegations, the higher your sales will be. Cha ching, baby. Also, and this is important: take potshots at unpopular figures. It doesn't matter if what you write is true; the only thing that matters is that it confirm what people already believe.
What are you waiting for? Start writing.
Armed with these tips, you're well on your way to climbing the bestseller list, winning new friends (alienating all your old ones), making piles of cash and losing all credibility. (or was that gaining credibility?).
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