Short List of Things George Bush Hates

Writing about the Rove-started fires in Southern California got us thinking about all the things George Bush hates--John Kerry, black people in New Orleans, you know, pretty much everything. And it's because there are so many things that we are making this a short list, because if we listed all of them, well, we'd be here all night.

Dick Cheney - you see, George Bush hates the Veep for different reasons than you do. He hates him because everyone gives Cheney credit for things Bush thought up--like torturing terrorists. And because strangely, the Angry Left hates Cheney more than Bush.

Children - HE VETOED S-CHIP!!!!1!!!11!!!!!ONE!!!!! What more do you need to know? He'd rather fund the war in Iraq than give children health care. Come on.

Black People in New Orleans - Why? Because Kanye said so, that's why. And we believe everything Kanye says. Because he's a legitimate source of political and social commentary. And really catchy hip hop songs.

John Kerry/John Edwards - because they have better hair, etc.

Osama Bin Laden - but not enough to catch him!

Will Ferrell - for the global warming special announcement spoof he did about President Bush.

This blog - for obvious reasons.


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George Bush Hates SoCal Democrats

Pictured above is a map showing the election results, by county, of the 2004 Presidential election. If you compare it to news of the fire in Southern California fires found on CNN, you'll note that most of the aid and fire support is going to "Red" counties--counties that voted for President Bush. Nevermind that most of the fires are burning in "Red" Counties, this is probably just because Karl Rove screwed up when he had the fires started.

Obviously George Bush hates Democrats in Southern California.

And to those who think the fires were caused by Global Warming--you've got it backwards. Bush and Rove started these fires because they wanted to make Global Warming worse. Why, you might be asking yourself, would they want to do such a thing? Because Rove has figured out a way to gain electoral advantage from Global Warming, of course.


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